Sunday, December 16, 2007

If Animals Could Talk

My favorite Bible story is Numbers 22:22.

Some unfortunate named Balaam is riding his donkey to Moab, and this pisses off God.

God sends the Angel of the Lord to stop Balaam. The donkey sees the Angel standing in the middle of the road with drawn sword and spooks, thus carrying Balaam to safety.

If I saw an Angel of the Lord standing in the middle of the road, I’d be spooked too.

But, Balaam brooks no such nonsense and beats the donkey until it returns to the road. This goes on two more times until the Lord gives speech to the donkey. The donkey explains the situation, and Balaam returns home a repentant sinner. The talking donkey is heard from no more.

Now, it has often occurred to me, when I am most frustrated with my animal companions, if somehow they were given the gift of speech in that moment, they’d say, “You dumb ass. I’m only trying to help.”


  1. rcipfw7:38 AM

    Haha cute

  2. I went right over to Jasmine, gave her a big hug and told her that I got the message: RUN FOR YOUR LIFE when you see a tailpipe...that is right, isn't it??

  3. Sarah,

    I used to get really clear messages from LIL. Make Earl share the cookies.


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