Colliding Disparities

Colliding Disparities is an anthropological theory that posits we become what we mock.

I can’t even count the times this has happened to me.

Most recently, what comes to mind, is the cursed iPod. After strolling a college campus where every, yes, EVERY, student I saw was plugged in and rocking to their own special beat, I lamented a generation who would never enjoy the sound of wind in the trees or the lilt of fragile birdsong.

When I bought one for myself after being seduced by a sale, I learned plugging in to one’s own special music is a convenient way to tell the world to take a hike, or at least, do not bother me right now.

The point being, by now, I should have known better.

Alas.

Cruising the Net, I wandered into an odd corner of cyberspace where denizens reject certain technologies, parading proudly backward to a simpler time.

Hipster PDA is a collection of 3x5 index cards printed with different forms, held together with a small binder clip and carried in a back pocket. This is a low-tech replacement for the ubiquitous electronic handheld device – the Personal Digital Assistant, that moved from techie cool to business hip to everybody has one.

The PDA in the Hipster equation stands for Parietal Disgorgement Aid, which made me think of brain puke. Which is also where I caught the train. I noticed blogs calling notebooks, Analog Capture Devices.

Analog Capture Device. Paper and pen in other words. I smirked. I scoffed. I decided some people have too much free time. I clicked and snickered my way through sites that offered all manner of forms as free downloads to personalize one’s own Hipster.

Wait a minute.

Not having met my procrastination quota for the week, I downloaded some forms which my printer then refused to print. Hook set. I couldn’t let the printer get away with ignoring my commands, so I persisted until neatly printed 3x5 cards were stacking up in tidy piles and looking, I might say, pretty cool.

Wait a minute.

Yep. Reeled in. Netted. Thrown in the back of the boat.

I made one for myself.

Useful forms, with a neat picture for a cover, held together with a small binder clip.

Oh brother, I thought. I hope everyone doesn’t decide to jump off a cliff, like my mother always warned me.

Except, I took my new Analog Capture Device on a shopping trip, and it was handy. Useful. Cuter than two puppies and neater than Seinfeld’s cereal cupboard.

First item on the shopping list card was more blank 3x5 cards.

The Hipster PDA still ranks pretty high with the Geek Quotient on the Dork Meter. I know this because the few people I told about it in the real world, rolled their eyes and smirked.

One thing can’t be denied. Really, which is more fun to write with?
Colliding Disparities. See who laughs last.