Swimming In The Kiddie Pool

Our town has a small independent film theater. Two screens. One regular size, in an auditorium with a stage where they also host small music venues and plays. And what they call the Screening Room which is a similar experience to inviting 30 friends over to watch your big screen TV.

This small theater shows the films the two big chain theaters in town think we're not interested in seeing.

This week they're showing SCOOP with Ian McShane (Stupid HBO), A SCANNER DARKLY with Keanu Reeves and CLERKS II, Kevin Smith's latest.

This is not your typical movie theater as it is in the old jailhouse. Easy for newcomers to become misdirected.

When we arrive, three young men, not teenagers, but young, were waiting in line. The term slackers came to mind, but I don't know if that's au courant.

There is no one in the ticket dispensing window.

One of the young men turns to me, throws up his arms and says, "Is this where you get tickets?"

"Yes," says I. "The guy has probably gone to start the first movie. He'll be back in a minute."

Husband Dearest wanders off to see if there's still room for us in SCOOP since we are arriving late.

Young Man #2, while staring at the movie posters in the lobby says, "I hate Keanu Reeves."

Third Young Man agrees. Young Man #1 grunts.

Young Man #3 says, "He was good in BILL AND TED'S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE."

I said, "Yeah, that was good."

They look at each other and laugh. (That's right boys. Get over it.)

Young Man #2 says, "I liked him in MATRIX, but just 'cuz it was different."

To which I replied, "His acting style was a good match for that movie."

Young Man #2 looks back at the poster and says, "Keanu Reeves is a douche."

Dude.

Then we were all saved from further interaction when the ticket seller returned and the young men went in to see CLERKS II, and we were turned away because SCOOP had been preempted by an extreme snowmobile movie. I don't know. It's Montana.

As we were driving away, I burst out laughing and HD says, "What's so funny?"

I say, "Keanu Reeves is a douche."

Which brings me at long last, Dear Reader, to my point.

There is no way I will ever write anything the young men going to see CLERKS or the baby teenagers at SNAKES ON A PLANE would want to see.

This is Part 2 of an ongoing marketing revelation I've been having in which Part 1 happened when I noticed movies I like usually bomb.

So, the biggest market segment, the one Hollywood relentlessly chases, is unavailable to me because I don't like those kind of stories.

Talking to the boys this week has made me wonder if I should be writing something else.

Like directions to the ticket window or weather reports.

Postscript

I do not think Keanu Reeves is a feminine hygiene product. I think he's cute. I liked THE LAKE HOUSE. Silly me.

An understated acting style often goes unappreciated. Just ask Clint Eastwood.